Keeping Them From Falling Out The Window

We are here during the Traverse City Film Festival.  What this means for us is that there is a tremendous amount of traffic.

This was the first year that they also have a Kid's Festival along with the Film Festival, so we took the kids to that yesterday.  They had arts and crafts and balloons and they all got free banks and drinks and toys.  All four of them received wooden kendamas, which are a traditional Japanese toy that consists of a wooden hammer with a solid wooden ball attached to it by a string and you are supposed to flip the ball up and land it on the hammer in different positions. 

I was told it was all the rage in Traverse City and all the kids are playing with it.

Doesn't that sound like a great idea?  Having four children swinging solid wooden balls around on the end of a stick inside of Grammy's condo?  The Japanese inventor of that toy sure as heck did not have four triplets staying in a 800 square foot condo with their mother-in-law.   

We spent the afternoon at East Bay and the kids collected seashells.  I'm not sure if they are called "sea" shells because this is not the sea.  Hmmmmmmmmm. 

Then we spent the evening at the park, like every evening we've been here.  So far since arriving, we have one scraped knee, one face plant, one bloody lip and gum, one banged up shin bone, and one hand missing all the skin off the palm.  The kids are having a blast!!!

Greg's mom's 85 year old neighbor saw me in the hallway and she asked, "Will anyone be falling out the window this year?"

Photography by Sarah



Not if we keep them at the beach and the park and festivals all the time!

Don't Mess With The Posse

Would you believe after spending $89 on a half gallon of natural sunscreen, buying containers to divvy it up, packing it, driving 2000 miles with it, then driving way out onto a peninsula to go swimming for the entire day, I actually had a container of shampoo instead of a container of sunscreen?

DOY!  This is how I ended up in the General Store, steeling myself to spend another $89 for what would surely be 4 ounces of hazardous chemical spray. 

When I walked in, I asked the store clerk, "Do you carry sunscreen?"

And I swear to God, she said, "We might have some back in our apothecary."

Apothecary is a fancy word for shelf of overpriced toiletries because you are on a peninsula, suckers. 
I was willing to pay any price, but sadly, they only had sun enhancers from 1987. 

So I found myself scrounging for a squirt from strangers on the beach and I loaded the kids up with Banana Boat. 

The kids are in heaven to be back on the beach on the Grand Traverse Bay. 

They spend every second of every minute building sandcastles. 

Greg's mom and I were sitting there watching Gregory and Austin when this 3 year old came barrelling down the sand and proceeded to kick and smash every bit of Gregory's sandcastle in the above photo.   

His dad came up behind and said to the boys, "He doesn't mean it."

I looked at the three year old and thought he most certainly meant it, but whatever, I'm not the sand police. 

Over the next hour, the boy came back on four separate occasions and destroyed Gregory's sandcastle.  Not ONE TIME, did his father or mother say NO.  STOP IT.  We don't do that.  Knock it off. 

Instead, they would say stuff like, "Honey, don't you want to make your own sandcastle?"

And I could see by the grin on the kid's face that he thought, "No, I want to do THIS."

Then he would kick Gregory's castle again since he got no consequence for doing it. 

Amanda even went way up on the beach to get away from him and build her own.  The boy found her, then walked up and sat right in the middle of her castle.  I was watching from the water as Austin came running by me with his yellow bucket full of water at warp speed, and he proceeded to throw it in the boy's face. 

Ohmygod, could I just die? 

The father jumped up then, ran over and said to Austin, "That wasn't very nice!"

Then Sarah jumped in and said, "Neither is wrecking sandcastles.  He is RUDE."

This was obviously too much confrontation for the guy, because he backed off and slunk off with his darling angel. 

I figured the kids had it handled, so I stayed out of the entire thing and moments later, the family packed up and left. 

That's one way to get rid of annoying people!

I might start carrying a yellow bucket full of water with me wherever I go.  Don't mess with my posse. 

Looking Out For Numero Uno

Illinois traffic lived up to its reputation and we spent hours at a complete stop yesterday, which caused Greg to make the proclamation that he is never driving to Michigan again.  You have never heard such whining and fighting in your life from the backseat.  In fact, he's never taking any of us on vacation again as long as we live.  He's going to start vacationing alone, he told us.

At one point, Amanda told Austin she is never ever going to visit him when she grows up and she's not even going to tell him where she lives. 

"I'll Google you!", he told her. 

Our condo is not actually available until Monday, so we are squeezing into Greg's mom's two bedroom condo for four nights. 

I don't know about the rest of them, but I'm going to be fine. 

Here's How We Do It

In Omaha, Nebraska yesterday, we stopped by the Omaha Botanical Gardens.

We ran up the stairs to Kenefick park to see the largest train engines that were ever built.

Amanda's eye is starting to look a bit better from her fall down the stairs.

We drove clear across Iowa yesterday.

We stopped along the way to hike and pick mulberries.

Greg taught the kids how to crack open hickory nuts.

We stopped on the Mississippi River in Illinois, the land of Lincoln.

We are staying in Ottawa, again, at Greg's BFF's house and will continue on this morning to Traverse City, ending our 2055 mile journey.

Here's how Greg's been dealing with the kids on the trip.

I spent my time in Iowa reading in its entirety, the summary of the 2008 Farm Bill, paying close attention to commodity subsidies, in light of our national paralysis to come to an agreement in raising the debt ceiling.  I'm just that sort of a geek.  Fortunately my friends are geeks, so Misti and I had a lengthy discussion about it and that killed almost 50 miles.

After that discussion, Misti directed me to this website, Charter School Scandals, which got me through another 200 miles.  How scary that one of the schools I actually toured and considered sending my kids to is part of a network of schools under investigation by the FBI because they are being sponsored by a T.u.r.k.i.s.h "prophet", currently exiled from his country and living in the Pennsylvania.  His 150 charter schools nationwide are using his philosophy which he believes in creating a "golden generation".  Shudder.    The majority of teachers at these schools are brought over with HB1 visas and have little or no teaching education and some websites are claiming that they must send back 40 percent of their income to T.u.r.k.e.y., where the exiled prophet is allegedly trying to overthrow the government.

As a taxpayer, this completely pissed me off.  This is the threat we face when we dismantle our public school system in favor of a loosely regulated charter system, using public funds with very little oversight.

I wonder what crazy stuff will get me through driving through Chicago and Indiana, where the roads have been permanently under construction for the last 40 years?

Nebraska Finally Won Me Over

This was the view from our hotel room in Silverthorne, Colorado.

I love this town and it has a beautiful biking/walking trail on the Blue River.

I didn't mention it yesterday, but Amanda got really sick after we arrived in Silverthorne.  She got really pale and complained about nausea and dizziness.  In the middle of the night, she fell halfway down the spiral stairs in our hotel room and now she has a puffy red eye where she nailed in on the wrought iron stairwell.

I knew that was going to happen to someone right when I walked in that room and saw those stairs.

I think she was suffering from altitude sickness.  She had all the symptoms and when I Googled it, pages and pages came up for how to deal with altitude sickness before lodging above 8500 feet.  For the record, we did nothing to prepare for that.  I didn't think of it.  It never even occurred to me.

Anyway, she is fine now that we are in the flatland.

We stopped in Idaho Springs and learned about gold mines and the environmental impact of 1300 orphan mines and their tailings on the Clear Creek watershed.

Gosh, I love stuff like that.

Then we drove out of the mountains and hit the Prairie, which is a Hate Vortex for me and Greg because we fight and argue every year in Nebraska.

Where were going to stop for the night?  How far where we going to go?  BLAH BLAH BLAH.  When the horizon stretches out in front of you for 50 miles and there is no discernible difference in elevation or appearance, I get tired and crabby.  At least in the desert, you have valleys and peaks and plateaus and canyons, and you can go from desert to juniper to pine in 20 minutes.  Or in the mountains, you have winding and twisting roads and beautiful peaks and rushing waterfalls.  In the Prairie, you have grass and corn and cows.  I put it up there with driving through Western Texas, which is equally miserable and long and desolate.

We did get our annual photo at the Pony Express statue right at the border of Colorado/Nebraska.

We finally pulled over in York, Nebraska.  They don't mess around in York.

I actually love Nebraska now because of this sign in our room.  You guys won me over!

I Know I Can Fly!!!!

San Rafael Swell

We actually got out of Vegas at 6:30am yesterday.  We woke the kids up and drove away.  Then drove back home to get everything we forgot, then drove away again.

I know I can fly!

We normally miss Colorado because we normally drive at night.

Colorado River

The Colorado River is raging this year and I'm so glad we got to see it!

In fact, I LOVE Colorado.  We should be staying HERE for a week!

I wouldn't mind moving to Colorado.

Greg actually booked us a suite in Silverthorne, Colorado, which is the exact opposite of pulling over in a rest area and sleeping for 50 minutes like we normally do.  This getting old stuff is wonderful.  

I mean we're still having issues with pulling over, and there was drama, but I am so in love with Colorado, we'll dwell on it in Nebraska tomorrow.

Off We Go!

Call me a Helicopter Parent, but wouldn't it freak you out if no qualified rock climbers are hooking your kids in before they climb three stories?

I admit to being freaked out by that.  Yikes!

I stuck around to make sure my kids didn't plummet to their deaths since I had signed a waiver releasing ALL liability.

By the time you are reading this, we will likely be in Utah.

Greg has agreed to stay the night in Colorado this year, instead of pushing it through 24 hours to Nebraska.  Can I get a hell yeah?

Greg's brother called last night and I told him that we were going to stop in Colorado this year, unlike every other year, where I become especially psychotic in the Heartland.

"Is Greg getting old?  The car is barely warmed up after 10 hours.", he laughed.

See what I married into? Greg's brother is heading to Alabama today to do mission work on homes that were ravaged by the tornadoes in May.  I wonder if he's driving?  I didn't ask.

Without thinking, I said before we hung up, "Have fun!"

"No, you have fun!", he told me.

I'm not sure who is going to have more fun.  It's a toss-up.

Overthinking The Lunchbox, Part 2

I finally took the Costco lunchboxes back yesterday and got my $60 back after reading all your comments.

Then the kids and I were at Trader's yesterday and lo and behold, they had a simple insulated lunchbag with a nice mesh bottle holder for their water.

I considered it a sign from God that it came in four colors.

And get this.  They were $3.99.  HEY YO!

I actually laughed when someone left the comment that "You know you are a parent if you are overthinking the lunchbox."  So true.  So true.

You should see my counter on a school morning when I'm trying to do breakfast and pack lunches at the same time.  I have flashbacks of being on the line trying to make Whoppers during lunch rush.



I think the new bags will be fine. They are roomy enough for an ice pack and tall enough to even fit a banana and I'm going to finally buy the plastic sandwich holders, so I won't have to worry about those getting smashed. Plus, they are lighter than last year's bags.  They'll just be walking advertisements for Trader's.

We have a new charter school opening by my house and I wanted to drive by it and check it out yesterday. The charter uses a national EMO (education management organization) and they have a super bad reputation for overcharging for the buildings they lease to their charters and overcharging for textbooks and using a super heavy hand in force feeding curriculum on their boards. In other words, the EMO is top-heavy in the extreme and one school in town is actually fighting to break ties with this EMO and it's been on the news.

But I wanted to check it out anyway.

When we pulled in the parking lot, the kids started CRYING AND WOULDN'T GET OUT OF THE CAR!

"Moooooooooooooooooooooooooom. We LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE our school.", they all bawled in unison.

They went on and on and on and on about why they love their school and how they love EVERYTHING. Their school is THE BEST school ever.

They finally got out of the car and we walked around the grounds, which are located in an old daycare facility. They were unimpressed in the extreme.

I have to say, they LOVE their school!!!!! Much more than me, apparently.

I should feel happy that they are happy and feel secure there, but of course then I wouldn't be overthinking it and then what would we talk about?

Nevada Legislature Chooses Smokers Over Children

When my kids were born, people were still smoking in the grocery store in Nevada.  They smoked in gas stations, restaurants, and convenience stores, too.  Anywhere you could find a gaming machine, you would find smokers because they were allowed to smoke and gamble, even if it was in the grocery store.  We have machines everywhere!  For instance, we patronize a locally owned dollar store by my house, and I noticed a couple weeks ago that the owner had installed a whole new row of poker machines.  I had to convince Gregory that they were not video games and it was against the law for him to even be seated in front of one.

Up until five years ago, if there was a machine, you could smoke in front of it.  

As a result, smoking is so ingrained in Nevada's culture, I even ran into smoking in a preschool I went to check out.  And who can forget the dentist who was smoking in his office?  Remember when I recently took Austin to the zoo here?  You had to walk through the gift shop to exit and they were smoking like fiends in there.

For years Nevadans tried to get smoking out of our grocery stores and restaurants, but we were faced with severe opposition from the gaming industry, so we could get no politicians to vote on restrictions.  In 2006, Nevadans put the Nevada Clean Indoor Act on the ballot and it passed with an overwhelming majority of support.  Eighty three percent of Nevadans supported it.   While exempting casinos, it banned smoking in any tavern serving food and all indoor public areas.

Over the last five years since the law passed, heart attacks and strokes in Nevada have fallen, on average 14 percent.  An estimated 340 people a year are not having heart attacks or strokes, with a savings of around 34 million a year in Medicaid and Medicare.   This is due in large part to employees not being subjected to secondhand smoke during their entire workshift.

So despite all the voter's support and the medical evidence that the ban is saving lives, our legislature voted in May to relax the rules that the voters passed, and allow any restaurant with gaming machines to allow smoking, in return for banning anyone under 21 from entering the establishment.  This might not seem like a big deal, but we have A LOT of restaurants with gaming machines.  

Which means our legislature has chosen smokers over children.  They have also chosen smokers over the health of the employees working in these facilities.

We are already seeing the effects.  My triplet mom friend went out to eat with her husband and trio at Timber's, where they eat ALL THE TIME, and the host told them smugly that they were not allowed to come inside with the children, so they had to leave.  

It will be interesting to see how this all works out.  Are the restaurants cutting off their noses to spite their faces?  Or do they really make that much more money off smoking gambling eaters, than non-gambling eating families?

I think it's pretty obvious that I hope they lose their asses on this new deal.

Playing With My Friend's Toys

My plan for yesterday was to stay home and clean out my refrigerator and pantry, since we'll be gone three weeks and Greg will not leave the air on.  I also wanted to start putting aside clothing we are taking and get organized.

Then my friend Misti called and said that her Fastlane from Endless Pools had been installed and we should come over and check it out.  I had never heard of one before Misti said she was getting one.



It creates an endless current in your pool that you swim against.

Or swim with, if you are seven.

It has 54 levels and when she put it on high, I literally couldn't even stand in the current.  It shot me to the other side of the pool like I was in a gushing river.

As soon as I win the lottery and get a pool, I'm totally getting one.  It costs more than my car.  Misti can afford these things because she has more money than me.  It was so fun for the kids.  Gregory was so worn out, he told me his muscles hurt.

After we left Misti's, I got a text from my friend Melanie.  Melanie has been sailing the Eastern Seaboard on her 40 ft sailboat all summer and they were sailing back into Miami.  She texted, "Why don't you hop on a plane and come spend a few days with us on the boat?"

I texted her back and told her I couldn't because we are going to Michigan.

OHMYGOD, could I just die?  Driving to Michigan with four kids or hanging out with Melanie on her boat?  UGH.

That's okay, I'm sure driving through Nebraska will be more fun than sailing with Melanie's family.

Kicking self.  Kicking.

She texted me back and said, "Why don't you let Greg drive them there?"

My friends are bad influences because I had to actually really think about that one before declining.  Remember when she called me and said, "I'm in South Beach by myself.  Why don't you hop on a plane and come hang out with me?"

Okay.  Friends.  Nobody call today to have me come play with your gazillion dollar toys because I will cave.  I HAVE TO CLEAN THE REFRIGERATOR, ladies.

Why Are You Psycho?

Since we will soon be heading to the Cherry Capital of the world, Traverse City, Michigan, I was excited to find the girls new cherry swimsuits, since they had grown out of the last year's.

In fact, Sarah has grown out of everything and is now a head taller than her siblings.

Making her appear to be the older sibling and the other three, the triplets.  She is still under 60 pounds, thus making her legally required to remain in her booster seat, although her head is actually getting taller than the headrest.  She weighs 56 pounds now.  I'm thinking she'll be five feet tall before she gets out.

My girls' hair is so trashed from the sun and the chlorine.  They are in and out of the pool all day long and their hair has turned into straw.  Help, Nancy!!!

I hear the Midwest is having a heat wave and is sweltering.  We've been so nice here, the kids have actually been playing at parks, which is not something we normally can do in July.  

Our neighborhood park recently closed down so that they could cut the shade structures off the existing play equipment, then add this elaborate overhead shade system.  It's truly lovely.  Evidently, Parks and Recreations is flush with cash during the Great Recession.  (???????????????????????)  Here I am, fighting tooth and nail for school funding, watching kids being bused in to our school who don't have adequate food or shelter, and we're building this right now?

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggg.

I went to the doctor's yesterday for my annual physical and I was walking out the door, Greg hollered after me, "Ask him why you are psycho?"

So I did.

My doctor started laughing and said, "Because you're a woman in your forties?  My wife is psycho, too."

So there you go.  A medical explanation for it, Greg.  There's always the fifties to look forward to.