Going To Hell In A Boat Without A Rudder

After our devastating news yesterday, followed by very little sleep because we were up on an adrenaline rush, we got up and took a bus over to Monaco today.

You guys, we know NO French. We have absolutely NO IDEA what we are doing. It is like the blind leading the stupid. But somehow we have just managed to get by with no planning, no direction, and absolutely no problems, if you don't count this broken down old barge we are on.

You have to love public transportation in Europe. We just hopped on the bus and found our way to Monaco, where we got to see the real Monte Carlo casino.



Monaco is absolutely gorgeous and clean and everywhere you look, you see fabulous, beautiful people in fabulous, beautiful clothing.

See them in this picture?



It was so good we got off the ship and went on our own. The atmosphere back at the ship was ugly and negative and horrible. You could not believe the panic. I felt so bad for the staff. People were unrelenting in their anger and they were just FREAKING OUT. All I could think is that we are getting a one hundred percent refund on our cruise. Laurie has an extra 3000 to play with, so what is the panic here?



We ran into our BFF and asked him where he was going now and he said, "According to these people, to hell in a boat without a rudder."

Then he begged us not to leave him when a pack of unruly Nearly Deads approached us. And one of the Nearly Deads found my blog yesterday and left me a pissy comment that I deleted, telling me I will be that old when my kids are out of high school. Okay. I suck at math, but I am certain I will NOT be 110 when the kids get out of high school. And if I ever get old and mean and lose my sense of humor, well I expect you all to track me down and slap the hell out of me.

Has life never thrown these people a curve ball in all their many, many, many years on earth? From the day I laid on an examining table and the doctor told me he saw three heartbeats, to the day I stood in the neurosurgeon's office and he pointed to a golf ball size tumor in my baby's brain, there is NOTHING you can throw at me now that will even FAZE me.

Stranded in Europe with a $3000 spending limit. Boo hoo. You would have thought somebody told these people they were having triplets. Gah. I hate to point out the obvious, but we could have broken down AT SEA. AND DIED.



We toured the palace of Prince Whoever Lives There. We are clueless.

Then we drank lots of wine and laughed and toured the cathedral that Prince Rainier and Princess Grace were married in.



I have a confession to make. I did not know I was not supposed to take pictures in the cathedral. Laurie and her sister and aunt were HORRIFIED. These girls are Polish Catholics from Chicago. Laurie's aunt is the youngest of eleven children. Laurie has like a thousand relatives. They are some serious Catholics.



The cathedral was gorgeous and Laurie and I lit candles for our deceased moms and Mrs S from Chicago. Edited to add: I guess you CAN take pictures. So there, girls.

Then we even managed to find the correct bus back.



Then we put on our black dresses and ate like queens at dinner.

Tomorrow, we go to Nice and our hotel. We have decided to spend the two nights in Nice, then fly to Rome on Monday. Booking a cruise on the Titanic may have been our best move ever.